Why do I Suffer?

Do you ever think why the things happen to you one way and not the other?

Things happen like that because you are programed in a certain way through past experiences and by your personal conclusion that you created about these experiences.

Unresolved trauma from the past will resurface in unconscious ways within the relationships we hold with ourselves and others. The closer and more intimate relationship, the more the past trauma and unresolved emotional states will show up.

All memories are stored within the limbic system where they are integrated within the brain in the chronical way. All of these memories create a story of the individual that makes sense for the individual. These logical memories can be found easily by connecting the time frame and the place. Storing of the traumatic experiences happens in a way different way. The brain during the traumatic experience works differently. The research shows, that during the traumatic experience, the hippocampus decreases its functioning, prefrontal areas shut down and amygdala becomes overactive. These changes lead to inability to sort out the traumatic memories, they become stuck and not compartmentalized. As a consequence, these memories are fragmented and free floating in the ocean of the unconscious mind, leading to uncontrollable situational triggers.

Emotional trauma could be connected to childhood memories, rage experienced at home, school, physical, mental abuse, feeling unprotected, abandoned and rejected, over controlled, death of someone we loved, and more.

What does happen with unresolved emotions?


These painful memories, as well as unconscious and blocked memories are stored within the body, muscles, organs, bones. They keep being alive although in the dormant state.

There is an undeniable link between childhood trauma and unresolved emotional states with  building relationships with partners, coworkers etc. It impacts the individual self-esteem, confidence and identity.

Unresolved emotions lead to anxiety and chronic stress that impacts the quality of life. Individuals that are not choosing to deal with their emotions often create codependent and toxic relationships at home and at work. They feel that life treats them unfairly and they blame others for the way their life looks like.

Instead of keeping the fragmented memories stuck, it’s much more valuable to observe, discover and heal them. There are many ways of healing painful emotions. All therapies that involve body and mind connection, including expressive arts, as well as work with the unconscious mind, including trauma work, regressive hypnotherapy, NLP, energy clearing can have a powerful and positive impact. These modalities can be used alone, or as an addition to talk therapy.

Written by Ania Haas MS.BCC

Ania Haas is a Board Certified Coach with over 16 years of experience in body and mind connection. Owns and operates Mindful Way Studio in Mokena, Illinois.




Flemke, K. (2009). Triggering Rage: Unresolved Trauma in Women’s Lives. Contemporary Family Therapy: An International Journal31(2), 123–139. https://doi-org.lopesalum.idm.oclc.org/10.1007/s10591-009-9084-8

If you are interested to hear more about the topic, listen to the Podcast #8 , link is here, where I speak about the superior customer service.

Ania Haas Podcast

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